8 Ways to Build Your Self-Care Routine
When coronavirus hit the world hard in 2020, so many of us were faced with unique challenges. As a collective, stress levels were at an all-time high. My go-to self-care routine seemed impossible or even dangerous during the pandemic.
We had to reevaluate and get creative with how we spent our time while staying home. I think for a lot of people, a sense of time and routine started to crumble. Personally, this meant that all those amazing self-care tools I kept in my toolbox also started to slip through the cracks. I realized (not so suddenly might I add) that I wasnβt caring for my body or mind the way I deserved.Β
I was overindulging on things that made me feel good and abandoning anything I deemed not worthy of stress. As much as I was trying to stay positive, I had to admit that the pandemic was taking a toll on me too.Β
I missed my family, friends, and traveling. Simple things like going to the grocery store or dressing up for a night out were all out of reach now. I missed all those passive self-care activities I didnβt have to think too hard about.
It became clear that the state of the world wasnβt going to get better overnight. Life wouldnβt be the same for a while and I needed to get back into a routine that worked for me. I needed to take the time to care for all aspects of my life and not just the ones that were offering me instant gratification.Β It became so apparent during quarantimes that self-care was more than just putting on a face mask at the end of a stressful day and calling it good.
We are more than our bodies, though our bodies are just as important as our emotional or spiritual well being. I think when most people talk about their favorite self-care activities, they share from two (maybe three) aspects of their lives. In reality we are such complex beings taking care of a whole ecosystem within us.Β
I see self-care as something that can be broken down into 8 main aspects of our lives – Physical, Emotional, Intellectual, Social, Spiritual, Financial, Professional, and Environmental.Β
When I first started thinking about my own self-care toolbox, I noticed it was full of unconscious activities. While they brought me much joy, they were limited to Physical, Emotional, and Environmental categories. I realized I needed to take a more active role in my self-care routine.
I created a free self-care check-in worksheet for myself and for all of you to download. Iβm the type of person who likes to write things down. In a way, itβs a form of self-care for me. I love creating a space at my desk or living room table to be productive. I enjoy making a nice cup of coffee, lighting a candle, getting all my good pens out, and writing down my intentions whether that be in a bullet journal, printable, or post-it note. Writing things down helps solidify concepts in my head and commits me to a task or belief.
Whether you decide to download the sheet or follow along with this blog post, I urge you to think of at least one way youβre already engaging in self-care for each of these categories. These are your strengths! I also want you to think about what you could add or change for each of these self-care areas. These will be your wishes that youβll probably have to take a more conscious, active role in for a while. You can think of these 8 strengths and wishes as your self-care routine.Β
These activities will be your tried and true go-toβs when youβre feeling particularly exhausted or angry or stressed. Take note of what areas come more naturally to you than others.
Remember, though, self-care shouldn’t be used as a bandaid. If we only engage in self-care when our cup is empty, weβre only engaging in damage control. Our minds and bodies will suffer in the long term.Β
On the other hand, if we take the time to listen to our bodies and notice the beginning signs of fatigue, sadness, anger, frustration, lack of inspiration, etc., then we can take action to relieve some of that stress. Eventually, we can make a self-care routine that comes naturally to us and even prevents some of those negative feelings from spiraling.
PHYSICAL SELF-CARE
When you ask someone to list some of their favorite self-care acts to engage in, I think almost everyone lists something physical in one way or another. A lot of people tend to focus on this sort of self-care because itβs probably the most immediately rewarding of the 8. At first glance, it can also appear to be the easiest. βYou mean I can just slap on a face mask and call it self-care? Letβs do that!β Well, maybe…but also, maybe not.Β
A face mask can surely be a part of your physical self-care routine, but even the most luscious face mask isnβt going to brighten those insecurities or that dayβs sadness for more than a few hours or a day. Small physical activities like this – getting your nails done, doing your makeup, getting dressed up, taking a bath – can help offer immediate relief when youβre feeling overwhelmed, stressed, down and are beneficial to include/keep in your self-care tool routine.
I challenge you to think of the reasoning behind these activities. If your answer is as simple as, βI like how a face cools and moisturizes my face. It helps clear my mind and relax.β Then thatβs great! But if you find that your answer is more along the lines of, βI was feeling insecure about my dry skin and acne so using a face mask made me feel like I was doing something to fix that.β Try to avoid behavior backed by the mentality that you need to be fixed.Β
Go to the gym because you love exploring nature and you want to be healthy enough to do that or simply because you love getting into cute workout clothes and running to music. Do yoga because it brings you peace or is a good physical and mental check-in for you. Cook a meal/bake because it brings you joy to nourish your body.
My Favorite Physical Activities:
- Dancing
- Painting
- Going for long walks
- Beauty – face masks, bubble baths, playing with makeup
EMOTIONAL SELF-CARE
As I mentioned, a huge part of self-care is noticing when we might need to take a moment to recenter and focus on ourselves. This isnβt always easy. Emotions are messy things. It can be difficult to identify the feeling weβre having and whatβs causing it. We might not even recognize the emotion until after it has passed and weβre in a clearer state which can leave us feeling guilty, sad, or exhausted.Β
Emotional self-care is the practice of mindfulness in regard to our mood and feelings. Itβs checking in with oneself throughout the day. Itβs taking the time to prepare yourself for whatβs ahead or debriefing after a stressful moment. Treat yourself with the kindness and care you would treat any other loved one.Β
Emotional self-care is investing in your mental health. It allows you to recognize when you might need to engage in another category of self-care.
My Favorite Emotional Activities:
- Journaling & blogging
- Affirmation cards – especially the Super Attractor Deck by Gabby Bernstein
- Listing what I’m grateful for right before bed
INTELLECTUAL SELF-CARE
Intellectual self-care includes activities that stimulate and challenge the brain. This is the time one takes to learn a new skill or improve on a talent they already have. Itβs what keeps your mind sharp. Itβs like working out but for your brain.Β
Personally, this was a tough one for me to figure out. Being an honor roll student my whole life then going on to double major in my undergrad and then continuing on to graduate school, I felt like I was intellectually challenging myself enough. It took me a long time to realize that stressing over 20-page papers and cramming for a class I donβt care about, isnβt intellectually challenging in a positive way. Itβs challenging because itβs uninspired busywork. Certainly not a form of self-care.
I feel like, for a long time, I lost my passion for learning and the skills I used to love. When youβre having to read 50 pages of a textbook, you start to feel overwhelmed and even guilty for reading anything other than the assigned content.Β
Intellectual-self-care is so important in keeping your mind healthy and active. Itβs vital in keeping your passions alive and is directly attached to your joy and personal growth.
My Favorite Intellectual Activities:
- Listening to podcasts
- Creative writing
- Going on a Wikipedia rabbit hole
- Reading non-fiction books
SOCIAL SELF-CARE
Social self-care is SO SO SO important. I think this became very obvious when coronavirus spread across the world in 2020. Isolating for even three months took a huge toll on many peopleβs mental health.Β
Humans are very social creatures. Weβve had to be to survive. One person fending for themselves in a strange forest just isnβt going to make it as long as a group of 20 people all sharing their resources and knowledge. The stress and burden of the individual can now be spread across family, friends, neighbors, etc.Β
Leaning on your support system in the 21st century may look very different, but is just as important as it ever was. Social self-care engaging in your love language with someone else, whether that be your friends, family, coworkers, or even a stranger on the streets. The desire to learn new perspectives, get advice, celebrate our wins, or simply be in the presence of others is a form of self-care that allows us to get out of our own head for a moment which is crucial.
My Favorite Social Activities:
- Playing board games with friends & family
- Dungeons & Dragons!Β
- Toasty Talks – like TED Talks but under the influence with friends
- Attending music festivals & going to meetups
FINANCIAL SELF-CARE
Okay. I know this one doesnβt seem as fun as the others and if youβre like me, youβre probably thinking, βHow in the world can finances be a form of self-care when itβs what causes some of the most stress in my life?β I understand but hear me out.Β
If money brings you some of the most anxious energy in your life, itβs possible that youβre not spending enough time implementing self-care practices involving your personal finances.Β
Financial self-care doesnβt have to be something huge like paying off all your credit card debt or investing in stocks (although it can). When tackling goals as huge as those, there are bound to be major stressors no matter how good it is for your bank account.Β While I encourage anyone to get out of debt or to invest their money, thatβs not necessarily what Iβm talking about when I say financial self-care.Β
Think, what would be the financial equivalent of putting on a face mask and sitting back to sip on some wine for 30 minutes?Β
Maybe itβs something as small as putting any loose change in a piggy bank. It could be downloading a budget tracking app. Maybe, itβs making a donation to the charity of your choice once a month.Β
I think the first step in reducing stress when talking about money is getting rid of some of the unknowns that are looming over us. I recommend looking over your expenses for the month. If sitting down to go over the previous months’ expenses seems too daunting, try signing up for Mint. Connect your bank accounts and download the app to get a better understanding of where your money goes each month. Itβs a great building block to financial success!
My Favorite Financial Activities:
- Carson & I have a “money cage” – it started as a joke but we put any extra cash in the cage.Β
- Finding Tax-deductiblesΒ – donating to places like Goodwill is tax-deductible. I didnβt find out until recently but Carson and I got memberships to the San Antonio Botanical Garden and $75 of our membership dues are tax-deductible.
- Carson and I have a whiteboard in our living room with our budgets that month for groceries, entertainment, eating out, and miscellaneous purchases
SPIRITUAL SELF-CARE
The meaning and presence of spirituality varies greatly from person to person. A lot of people associate spirituality with religion which it certainly can be, but religion definitely isnβt the end all be all of spirituality. I define spirituality as the belief system that governs a personβs morality due to their understanding and belief of where they, as an individual, and humans, as a species, belong in the universe.Β
For some, this belief system aligns with religion so spiritual self-care may look like praying or reading religious texts. For others, it might look like reading their astrology chart or getting a card reading. It can have a physical aspect like being in nature and meditating.
My Favorite Spiritual Activities:
- Watching space documentaries and discussing our place in the universe
- Sitting (or hanging in a hammock) with nature
- Stargazing
PROFESSIONAL SELF-CARE
This is another area I think people donβt initially take into consideration when talking about self-care. Our professional careers are arguably the largest part of our everyday lives whether we like it or not. So when work or school brings us stress, we need to have some tools in our toolbox to tackle this large portion of our lives.Β
Professional self-care looks like taking initiative, being prepared, and always looking for ways to grow. Itβs the time taken to align your passions and values with the work that you are doing every day.
My Favorite Professional Activities:
- Writing down career goals
- Joining professional clubs/groups
- Developing a professional wardrobe
ENVIRONMENTAL SELF-CARE
Your surroundings have a huge impact on your overall well being. There have been so many studies on how wall color can promote quicker healing in hospitals or how natural light leads to more productivity or how houseplants can reduce stress and improve air quality. And it makes sense!
Think about the last time your life was in chaos. What did your room look like? Clothes were thrown around? Empty food containers lying around? Is bed unmade?
I think people have this assumption that when things arenβt going right in other areas of our life, our environment tends to suffer, which may be true, but we rarely think about how, if our environment is a mess, that mess will seep into other areas.
Environmental self-care is taking the time to make your surroundings a place you want to spend time in. Itβs creating a space or going to a place that reduces stress or inspires you.
My Favorite Environmental Activities:
- Decorating my desk for a productive home office space
- Plants – plants everywhere!
- Lighting a candle or diffuser with my favorite essential oil
- Opening curtains to let natural light in
- Just being outside honestly
I hope you can see how important a self-care routine is for every aspect of your life! If you downloaded the worksheet, I hope you were able to identify some strong self-care techniques that you are already engaging in but also found some that you wish and intend to add to your toolbox.
This is such an excellent point! Don’t use your self care to beat yourself up. :p
[…] Being mindful of our emotional ebb and flow is not only a great form of self-care but is essential in minimizing those toxic positive thoughts.Β […]